Vicious

Happy birthday daddy!

2005-09-09T04:03:00.000+08:00

Lol i know it's a stupid title, but happy birthday to my dad. Should count myself lucky to remember it's his birthday, or i'm gonna get hell lots of scolding for being bo sim again. Oh, he sounded so happy guess he didn't expect that i'll rememeber his birthday.

Hmm hmm, girl ah. somehow thanks for proving me wrong, hopefully things will went out well okies? oh yeah, stop saying thank you or stuff lidat. I don't like. oh lets watch stars while eating dimsum next time okay? LOL sound abit stupid but oh well.. =p Hmm, don't worry you're the other princess that i'll treat as. Whatever i've said to you, i meant it. really. =D

Oh, why am i still awake, i think that's a pretty good question. I'm spending like 1 hour rolling stats for my maple thief, don't ask me why i start maple. The other reason i can say is that i've my jie and friend playing it. so.. yep! maple! oh btw, warrior sucks ass. =D

Hohoho.

2005-09-04T02:23:00.000+08:00

Oh been sometimes since i last update my blog. Hmm, for one thing i'm sure, i guess i forget about her already, i saw her at the escalator with her sister. I still even say hi lol, kinda crappy but well. Good for me also.

Come and think of it sometimes it's really all about fate maybe if i didn't lose her, i won't be able to know you. You didn't lose a catch cause i'll be waiting for you. I promise. i <3 u. .annivlek. =)

Updates.

2005-09-01T09:13:00.000+08:00

Ohhh, sometimes since i last blogged. Better do it now, if not jasmine gonna say i didn't update again lol. Been like 5 days since i quarrel with jie, didn't talk to her until now.. I donno if i'm dreaming or what.. but it's like i've saw her message on msn.. Can't really recall the content though.. When i check my log, nothing's there.. Most probably, of course.. I'm dreaming.. Things probably went fine now, not that sad already almost outta your shadow.. Went CMBP (central manpower base) aka, the place where you check up for NS that day. Seriously, everyone looked so gay there. spend like 2 hours on check ups and another 2 hours on SURVEY. Fking stupid man. A booklet of like 21 pages, 30 question almost every page and computer questionnaire -_- I'm in pes B, more then what i've expect. Ew! Hmm mind kinda blocked now, if there's anything i'll update later. Jai ne~

How worst can it be?

2005-08-26T11:59:00.000+08:00

Slept damn early last night because afterall i'm still sad about it. Woke up pretty early, 5.20am. Things still alright in the morning, didn't have luck mf'ing in diablo and i know it's not gonna be my day. Went to timzone, first time in my life to play a initial d match and i lost it. It's my best map and i lost it. Somehow i really can't take it. Even though we still win, but there's something inside me that i'm not really happy about. I had my hair cut after timezone, finally. A very short hair, but somehow i still like it. Crap alot with the auntie, then i realise how stupid i'm. I should have listen to her word last time. We went back to timezone to 'pump' my car, but for fuck sake it's as if all of that credit isn't mine. Stop asking me for credits!

After all. i still don't really feel good, even though i really wish to put everything down, but i've no idea how to do it. Seeing your nick meant for other, you know how i feel? No.

Cutting my own flesh to let you go

2005-08-25T00:53:00.000+08:00

I guess today is probably the worst day of the month, dreamt of an irritating person and woke up because i couldn't stand it anymore. Was thinking if to dream of you, things will be better. But after talking to you.. i guess not.. I can't believe that you'll message me to chat and to frank with me that you've already got a boyfriend, i stunted for awhile, not feeling good because of what you've told me last time. But i also remember of saying that if you're happy anything counts, So i sincerely wish he'll treat you well and be happy with him. (: I hope he'll love you as much as i do or even more. Not forgetting, still friends, don't worry and don't have to keep apologizing.

I've been thinking for sometimes and alway bothered by the o' level english oral question, What's your ambition. I really felt stupid and useless, how worst can a human get, i think i'm 100% worst. I must improve and change myself.. I'll do it.. I guess this year is really an eyeopener for me, i'll keep it in my heart, move on and be happy. I must be like Eileen, strong. Listening to your words alway makes me feel much better, thanks for scolding and being there for me.

I'm not gonna delete or save anymore post as draft. Afterall, it's a blog, a diary of my life.

I've never felt so hurt before, indescribable pain's filling me up. But i've learn alot and believe i've grown up alot. I'll be fine soon, thanks for the people who are concerned about me and i love you mummy. Although i'm not a good son, alway didn't do the things that i've say and alway quarrel with you. But i'm very lucky to have you as my mum. So a big thank you to you for alway being there, stand my nonsense and care for me. I'll try to be a good son to you and i'll be filial, i promise.

Raining day..

2005-08-23T10:35:00.000+08:00

Was raining heavily.. mum couldn't go to work, so decided to go downstair to eat breakfast, was walking up the stairs.. and your image flew over.. i rememeber.. there's one time, rain was like so big.. and you just walk to my house, end up damn drenched.. so i pass you my pe tshirt for you to change.. and dry your clothes up.. to think about it.. time past damn fast.. really fast. You probably don't think about me anymore.. but i hope that you still keep those thing that's from me.. mum order toasted bread.. yeah.. rememeber those that i bought for you for breakfast? i really miss sending you to school.. everytime i walk past those road that we once walked before.. i just can't stop but to think of you.. hais..

Feeling like blogging.

2005-08-20T09:10:00.000+08:00

Been a long time since i've update my blog, was feeling bored now so decided to update it. Alot of thing happened recently, thing where i have to make decision, thing where i have to do and so on. Hopefully everything i do, i won't regret. I think i'm gonna flunk my O's level, giving me stupid picture of few student and a teacher asking me to describe, the fuck i know what to say. It's raining and i'm feeling so damn freaking sleepy and worst of all. They asked me what's my ambition! I've never really thought of my ambition, so i was trying to crap some lame stupid story but seems like i failed to crap. Bah, bull shit it's. But it's not really a bad day. Broke some initial d record, guess i'm getting better on it. I know i've to be more serious when challenging people, i alway take it too lightly i guess. After arcade as usual to wash our hands, outside the toilet, i saw my ex neighbour. Omfg that's like so wonderful, the reaction of his is so damn funny. When i talk to him he was like so blur and when i tell him i'm the one staying behind him, he paused for awhile and his reaction was so damn big and funny. Was talking to him thru msn in morning and when i told him i return everything to you, he said that i'm stupid. Should keep as memories, but good memories are meant to be kept in my mind.. if they have to go they go. Beautiful memories will alway stay, yeah.. that's why i avoid going places we alway go, things that we used to do, things that we used to eat. I'm mad, yes i'm. I just wish to be me.. Was playing diablo and for the first time, i got a soj of mephisto, omfg how lucky i'm! Hmmm i'm getting thinner day by day i guess, 2 weeks ago i was like 58kg and few days back, i measure again and it was like 57kg. I'm dying. =D I really feel like changing my life it's getting so boring.. Actually for some reason.. I felt that i've changed.. yeah..

Troubled.

2005-07-27T01:56:00.000+08:00

An irreplacement moment was made. Now, it had become of the past. Memories can be forgotten in time. The steps we made.. The humble day we lived in. We only have one piece of evidence of that time.. Thing alway changes, but something never change.. You can forget about something, but you can't forget everything.. My mind's filled things that doesn't have a definite answer, thing's that if i do i might regret.. I really don't wish to think about anything.. I really don't understand why when i treat people well they tend to turn out the way that i don't like.. Just stop ranting on my mind and get outta my head, how i really wish there'll be no worries, no troubles. Had a freaking quarrel with mum, i can't understand why she alway like to find trouble with me, can't she just try to fucking understand how i really feels?
I'm really fucking breaking down and things just never end, fuck shit.

I just don't wanna be unfair to you..

Bloody eye.

2005-07-25T03:10:00.000+08:00

Had so many things on mind, but didn't know where to start.. Kinda stupid, but i woke up in a different way today, was feeling itchy on the side of my left eye and when i scratch it, it bleeds.. Alot of blood came out, even til now 3am in the morning my left eye is still aching.. Still bothering by the topic that came across yesterday, it seems like girls only do things that benefit them more, it's like so unfair and selfish to guy. Maybe that's life.. Went to timezone to meet KS and Dominic came after awhile with Denise and there goes KS and KS if you're reading this read this properly >> YOU'RE NOTHING BUT A FIGGING KUS DOG! << Didn't do quite well today.. But can improve! that's for sure. Somehow, i feel like giving up on everything.. inculding studies, i'm really tired about everything that happened in my life.. I really need a break from everything.. Finally revamped my whole blog.. nice song by jay, whenever i'm alone or walking past places where we went before.. I'd listen to it.. My sister told once me, that you've heard things like i'm gonna revenge if you're coming back to me.. but am i such a person to you? Logged on friendster to browse around.. For no reason, i just type on your e-mail and search for you.. It seems like, you've got someone in mind already.. Don't be sad.. you know i never like you to be.. Just work hard for it.. Good luck..

One year.

2005-07-18T00:00:00.000+08:00

One year, maybe you don't even rememeber or maybe you don't even come and check on my blog anymore.. You said.. we have some misunderstanding, why can't you just talk to me.. We really cannot solve problems even as now? I really wonder.. what will we be now.. I can't feel happy, neither that i wanna be sad, but i just can't stop thinking about you and our past.. Memories of you and me.. really tormenting me... I know.. you're happy.. But.. somehow.. i can't.. I'm no one who can say you, or what.. i just hope that.. you're doing fine.. take care of yourself well.. Ko L vY..